Go! Pause! Stop!

Healthy relationships have been our focus during Session 2 across studios. We have been exploring what it means to be in a healthy relationship, how a healthy relationship feels, and what it means to have healthy conflicts with the people we care about.

We started with a reflection on the relationships that are meaningful to us and how we know that these relationships are important. Across studios there were many debates about who to pick as their healthiest relationship to reflect on. Many learners were torn between Mom and Dad. Character traits such as honestly, trust, kindness, dependability, and humor were important to all learners. Questions we reflected on included: What makes you feel loved? What characteristics make you feel good? What is important to you in a relationship? How do you like to be treated? How do you treat others? How do you define a “healthy relationship”?

Healthy relationships are unique to each individual, family unit, and setting. Healthy relationships depend on your culture, religion, age, and so much more. So, how do you know when a relationship is healthy? There are three key factors that affect whether we are in a healthy relationship. These are safety, health, and happiness. We should feel safe, physically and emotionally. We should feel accepted, have freedom of choice, express positive communication, have healthy conflict management, and trust. Relationships should be filled with joy. You know you are experiencing a healthy relationship when you treasure your time together.

Through this lens, the learners debated different scenarios identifying which behaviors were healthy, “green light” behaviors, which behaviors should give you pause, “yellow light” behaviors, and which behaviors are unhealthy, “red light” behaviors. Questions we explored together included: Is this relationship request/behavior reasonable? Is it healthy? What are the real issues in this relationship? What are the possible compromises for this situation? How would you manage and resolve this conflict?

One of the most important relationships we have is the one we have with ourselves. Each studio spent time exploring the characteristics that make their relationship with themselves a healthy one. Spark identified what makes them each unique and special. Discovery and Adventure learners reflected on their inner dialogue. What green light, yellow light and red behaviors do you express internally? What do you say to yourself that is positive? What do you say to yourself that you think you need to pause and reflect on? What negative things do you say to yourself? How can you rephrase them? 

Healthy relationships can make such a difference if our overall wellness and longevity. Take a moment to reflect on the healthiest relationship you have in your life. What makes you feel safe? What makes you feel happy? How do you know that this relationship is healthy?

If you are looking for a way to reflect, check out these healthy relationship worksheets for adults.

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