Three Things

By Lauren Quinn, Co-Founder & Head of School

It seems I’m just discovering what it means to be a parent. After many mistakes and still frequent missteps, I have come to realize my main job as a parent (beyond meeting my children’s basic needs) is to listen, share stories, and ask good questions.

Just three things- I wish I had figured this out sooner.

Listen. Actively. Whole body, put down my phone, I see you and I care about what you have to say. Listen to the moments of joy, of celebration. Listen to the moments of struggle, of challenges.

Stories. I’m convinced that my boys listen to 50% of what I’m saying on the average day- Except when I’m sharing a story. Stories captivate. The best stories are those that involve struggle, disappointment, embarrassment- stories from childhood or stories from last week.

Questions. The quality of the questions matter. The best questions stem from a motive of genuine curiosity and have many possible answers. Here’s a question we’re asking in our home this week: If you had to choose between doing an easy thing or a hard thing, what would you choose? Why? (Another favorite: Is forgetting a choice?).

I can quickly recognize what I’ve strayed from doing these things. I feel less connected to my boys and less joyful. The world of lectures and demands can do this. So when I find myself there, I remind myself to slow down and take time to do these three important things.

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